Happy 18th Dylan

My son Dylan turned 18 today. My how time flies!!! Just in time as I have been anouncing how I'm tired of Parenthood. Trust me....Its been a real adventure.

Dylan quit school last semester and has been full time in the work force. He has worked hard and is considered a valuable employee. He has learned a lot and has gained experience he wants to pursue a carrear as a millright. He has aslo learned that he would be unable to raise a family or even support himself with the money he makes.

He has decided to return to school in September.....Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!!!! I could tell him until I was blue in the face and he sick of hearing it!! BUT he needed to go and experience it for himself. I have refrained from " I Told You So". I am excited for him. It looks like his employer will allow him to continue work AND go to school.

For a birthday present I am going to pay for his hotel room at the Lake Placid "Miracle on Grass" International Rugby Tournament. He earned a spot on the North Halton Mens Team.

I thought about buying him a watch for his 18th birthday. I thought it was a great idea but my wife said the idea sucked. She said he will lose it or break it within a week and the only thing that would be left is bitter tears and sorrow. Besides, she said, he doesnt even know how to tell time!!! He has grown up in the digital world and concepts like analog time are a mystery. Actually, He secretly tells me he knows he knows analog time...he's just been using it as an excuse....go figure

haha pssst
one down and one to go!

Back Pedal or Erase..That is the ?

OK so in a fit of passion, or insanity I wrote in my last blog... "I am tired of fatherhood". That is not really correct in the big scheme of things. I think I need to back pedal a bit. Fatherhood is what has defined me and my life. I wouldnt take it back for anything. I dont beleive I could be the person I am without my kids. My wife and I were united not only by our love, but also our desire to have children. Have I been a good father? I guess we all ask ourselves this. Could I have done things better?..probably. Do I have regrests? Well ya..I wish I handled things differantly here and there. Actually, I kinda feel like a failure sometimes. Yet other times I am the proudest person alive. SO...I am going to rephrase the statement. " I am tired of Parenthood"

Rugby vs Lake Superior Provincial Park

I got a call from Dan's brother Tom. Dan is my good friend who just took his own life a couple months ago. His favourite place in the world was Lake Superior Provincial Park. The family decided that they would dump his ashes in OldWomans Bay. They are going to do that on the Long weekend. I have every intention of being there. Its about a 10 hour drive from my place. Long drive, but, you gotta do what you gotta do...Besides, this park and surroundiings are nothing less than spectacular.

I asked my wife to come and she said that she wouldnt leave Dylan alone at home. I reminded her that he was 18 years old. She said..Yes I know, thats why...what were you doing when you were 18? hmmm good thought. So I invited him to come along. He has no interest. I tried the bribe route and I tried the demand route....not much success.

So now the Rugby side... Dylan was very frustrated with his old team Fergus. They had been champs, but new coaching brought a decline in performance. He was continually frustratred with the team that was adrift in the ocean with no direction. I told him to put up or shut up. I told him to either accept the team as it was and join the country club OR quit the team and focus energy elsewhere. That is what he decided to do. He quit Fergus and moved to the North Halton Highlanders. He plays in differant division so now I get to see a bunch of new cities. I watched them play and it was really great..almost graceful. The team is focused on team play and passing. They are a beautiful team to watch. Dylan is very very happy. Last night he was asked to play on the mens team. He was asked to go on tour with them to Lake Placid in New York on the long weekend. He was thrilled and I gave my permission.

SO NOW MY WIFE DOESNT HAVE AN EXCUSE FOR NOT COMING TO LAKE SUPERIOR WITH ME> I am excited. We will rent a cottage or room for a couple of nights. We will go there via my friend Mikes house so she can see what has been taking up so much of my time.

I have every intention to move to Northern Ontario. While my family is OK with my plans, they have yet to show any excitement or take any ownership. Maybe they think I'm just dreaming. I had hoped to show them all the cool places I have been to. I hoped to show them the 3 cities I have shortlisted. I certainly dont want my family to be unhappy...that wouldnt work. But on the same token, I am very tired and fearful of my current job and lifestyle. I yearn for change. I yearn to follow my dream. I am not getting any older and frankly have almost reached my limits for tolerance. I am tired of the Toronto influence. I am tired of fatherhood. Dont get me wrong..I love my kids and I'm in the home stretch now. Despite this I CANT WAIT FOR MY FREEDOM BACK. I cant wait to do things for me, rather than them. Sounds selfish...yes...But I beleive I've earned it.

I know that nothing is forever, BUT, I dont want to look back at something for never! I will pursue my dream full steam ahead like a bull in a china shop, knowing that if my wife cant adjust then I'll have to make a choice. My choice would be to chose my wife over everything. I would sooner die than to fail her. Its the way its always been. I just hope and pray that she gives it a fair try with open mind and an understanding of how much this means to me.

Truly, I look forward to the day when she says to me. WOW. I love it here. Thankyou for being a bull in a china shop!.......and then I woke up....oh and by the way Don, you missed your sales target and now we have to lay someone off.

2 Rescue Stories

I received this email. I read it with great interest. Here it is

If you read the front page story of the SF Chronicle, you would have read about a female humpback whale who had become entangled in a spider web of crab traps and lines She was weighted down by hundreds of pounds of traps that caused her to struggle to stay afloat. She also had hundreds of yards of line rope wrapped around her body, her tail, her torso, a line tugging in her mouth. A fisherman spotted her just east of the FarraloneIslands (outside the Golden Gate) and radioed an environmental group for help. Within a few hours, the rescue team arrived and determined that she was so bad off, the only way to save her was to dive in and untangle her...They worked for hours with curved knives and eventually freed her. When she was free, the divers say she swam in what seemed like joyous circles. She then came back to each and every diver, one at a time, and nudged them, pushed gently around-she thanked them. Some said it was the most incredibly beautiful experience. The guy who cut the rope out of her mouth says her eye was following him the whole time, and he will never be the same. May you, and all those you love, be so blessed and fortunate .? to be surrounded by people who will help you get untangled from the things that are binding you. And, may you always know the joy of giving and receiving gratitude.
I pass this on to you, my friend, in the same spirit.

wow neat story!!! It reminds me of a similar rescue story, although not as grand!

I was cleaning my pool and had removed and replaced the filter cartridge. When I reassempled the pump, I noticed a bug in the see through enclosure. He looked at me and seemed quite panicked. I said...sorry bug. Well the water started to pour in and he became more frantic and panicked. I couldnt stand it! I aborted the mission. I took the pump apart and rescued that stupid little bug. I cant beleive it. So there you have it....2 rescue stories..... I like the whale story better!

The Human Volcano...Kids dont try this at home!

We were chatting at Lunch and I was reminded of this funny tale.
I had a very upset stomach after drinking way too much orange juice. I asked my wife for Tums or Alka Seltzer and we had none. So I remembered from science class how sodium bicarbonate could offset acid. So I took a small glass of water and poured a couple of table spoons of sodium bicarbonate into the water. I stirred the "medicine" and poured it down my hatch. Within seconds I could feel rumbling. I ran to the sink just as the explosion happened. OMG...It was like the exorcist or something. White foam came exploding from down deep. It shot out like a massive volcano. I laughed my face off. I mean...what was I expecting?
So kids....dont do this at home.

First Full Sunday in the New Digs

We held our first full service at the new home. It was so great! We had a lot of visitors. It was nice to hear Praise music coming out of this notorious place. We even had some visitors from other churches. I guess they wanted to see what kind of people would hold church in a bar. uuuuuhhh NO we did not serve alcohol. In fact even the communion wine is not wine...its grape juice. Man, we could keep ourselves quite occupied debating the intricacies of holding church in a bar. Anyway, the service went great. It was a very happy moment for many of us. We will continue to navigate the tides. Gods name will be glorified and Praises will pour out of this unlikely spot.

Great Minds Think Alike and Fools Seldon Differ

I got a good laugh when I read my brothers blog recently. On Thursday, he wrote about a skunk mishap. On Thursday I wrote about a skunk mishap. Neither of us knew the other had written. Here is a link to the article he wrote. I guess his skunks arnt trained yet....oh and forgive me for laughing...it was no laughing matter! However, I saw the new bathroom and understand why that would be the chosen bunker!

If you get a chance, check out his blog. He and his family are heading to Kyrgystan for 6 months or so on a missions trip. They have been planning for this for quite some time. Julie got winded when she realized how quickly things are coming together. John reminded her that it is time to send for the visa's.

If you have a heart for missions, you will be quite interested in their work over in Kyrgystan.

Crossings Church in Acton

After many delays, hurdles and challenges, we at Crossings Church in Acton have a new home! Its spectacular! Up until now, the bar was called Mannys road house. It was also known as the Sit-n-Bull. Prior to that it was called Roxy. The local police and tired neighbours have referred to it as the Blood Bucket. The bottom picture is an artist concept for a re-worked facade.

I had my first opportunity to visit last night. I was suppossed to help clean up so we could have service there on Sunday. I saw the stage, all decked out with mics and amps and speakers. That was it. I grabbed my guitar and sang. The sound was great! I cant wait to make more music in this place. I am excited about a weekly open stage music night. I think I will spearhead something like that.

I closed my eyes and took a deep whiff. It was like heaven. It smelled like Beer. I remarked that it will be a shame to lose that smell. I wonder if there are any spray deoderant air freshner things that smell like "last nights beer joint". I sure would love to keep that smell. I doubt my fellow parisheners agree, but hey...I'm a bit of a rebel.

Our numbers have been climbing. We havent officially "gone public" yet. We have been ramping up, getting organized, and establishing our visions and goals. We are very excited to share this wonderful building with the town.

My Dis-Functional Household

I cant beleive it. I'm such a red neck. So I have skunks that hang around my place. We have come to interact quit well. We have never been sprayed. So far we have co-existed quite well. Now this morning Mr Skunk walked in through the front door cat hatch. I said excuse me sir, but can you please leave my house. I reached over and opened the door. Well he spotted the dead mouse that my cat left at the front landing and decided he wanted it. I said leave and he motioned that he wasnt going anywhere without the mouse. So what could I do? I said OK, take the mouse and get out. He grabbed the dead mouse and made a brisk retreat. He was so bold that he didnt bother to leave my front deck before eating his prize. He enjoyed his one course meal right then and there. My cat wasnt so thrilled as that mouse a present for me..not the skunk. I really need to do something about that cat entrance. I love the convenience and so do the cats, but I'm getting as little tired of trying to corral skunks out of my house with out incident. I'm such a red neck and I live in a dis functional household. My friends at work just shake their heads....I imagine you do too!

Update your Blog Don

I was noticing that my blog is getting stale and old. I need to clean some things up. I need to update my prayer list for sure and remove the Seminary books.

One thing is I did quit seminary. I do not beleive I will be returning in the near future. Initially, I felt a very strong calling to learn, yet dont feel the call to become a Minister/Pastor. I dont regret the time and money spent. It was awesome, and yet quite difficult. I just felt that if I had no intentions of becoming a Pastor then the end of the tunnel seams hazy to me. Furthermore, seminary study is very very demanding and I just found the social cost was too high. It is very difficult to work full time and be a good daddy and husband. I sense I was failing. I had to decide what was most important at this time of my life.

I have also learned several things about myself that would not make me a very good Pastor. I know Pastors are not perfect, but I am so far from perfect its frightening. I have found myself doing and saying things that are not becoming of a man of the cloth. I guess deep down, I dont have the passion to continue the struggle.

I have also done some reflecting and realized that every church I have ever been to has had at least one person who's job it is to ruin a Pastors life. I am astounded how a very few number of people can choke and overwhelm a Pastor. I am told that a majority of the time and effort is spent on a minority of people. Whats worse, is the people who chew up the most resources, are the poeple who will never listen or repent. I am not a confrontational person, but as a Pastor I would need balls that I dont have.

I had begun this journey with a deep love for God. I wanted to be Jesus to the hurting. I have a strong compassionate heart. I guess this was just a romance thing as I was continually told and reminded that "Being a good christian is a difficult thing and requires a lot of hard work" "Its not completely a matter of the heart but of the will and mind also" While I didnt fully agree I saw the point. If I wasnt prepared to study the word day and night and seek to fully understand and convey the Word in a manner that is understandable to the seeker or the christian, then what was I doing? Its one thing to love God with all your heart, yet another to be able put all of that into action before others.

My biggest frustration is that the debates are endless and long on the "ACTUAL" meaning of Gods word. The debates and arguments are endless as each person wants to be "correct" yet reads and understands things differently. Do I beleive there is such thing as absolute truth? ABSOLUTELY! Do I know what that truth is......doh. YOu got me there. Initially I felt that my heart relationship was what God desired of me, Yet am reminded that there is responsibility too! I am afraid I lack the desire and passion to tear it all apart. I really worry that while us "super christians" endlessly debate...people are hurting and killing themselves and tearing apart each others lives. People are lost and calling out for help. The NOISE of debate was drowning out the cries in my head.

I still love God and I try to do my best to maintain a love relationship. I try and listen to Him. I beleive my only hope of salvation is through Jesus. I beleive that this is going to be good enough for me, YET...not good enough to be a Pastor.

I have no interest in getting into endless debate of intricacy. Father forgive me if I'm wrong.

Dear God
PLease help me be a good son. Help me Lord to do your will. Help me to understand what that is right in Your eyes. Father forgive me and my humanity. Forgive me please if I let You down. Help me to focus on what You think is important. Help me Lord to focus on You and not the opinion of others. Thank You for dying on the cross for a wretched person as I.

MidWeek Vacation

Hey whatever happened to the water slides at Wasaga Beach 1? I took a one day vacation to be with my daughter and we decided to go to Wasaga Beach. Well before long we had 4 people and then we had 7. What a great day! Despite the weather man calling for rain...we braved on. Much to our great fortune the weather was awesome! The ladies had a great time swimming, snacking and shopping. My buddy Ron, My brother in law Gord and I had fun as well. The water was beautiful. The thunder and rain arrived at 5pm. You should have seen the beach clear. Within half an hour the place was a ghost town. I'm back at work today with a bit of a sun burn, rather refreshed. BUT...I still need to know......Where did the slide rides go?

River Valley Adventure

I took the drive up north for fun and frolic in River Valley. My buddy Mike just bought an ATV. What a blast! Up in River Valley there are 1000's of miles of logging and bush roads. There is also a "highway" that used to be railroad tracks. The tracks got ripped up leaving this highway through very remote Ontario wilderness. I hopped on the back of Mikes ATV and he drove me to a remote spot on the Sturgeon River and left me there to fend for myself. I made my way down to the river and found myself a slick little spot. I caught a few Small Mouth Bass and then made my way back up to the trail. Mike picked me up and then gave me the ATV for a couple of hours. What a blast!

Thinking about You. You know who you are. I trust all is well.

Bike Rides and Camp Fires

My Buddy Barry asked me to come over for a visit at his camp trailer. They elected

to park the trailer at Guelph Lake Park rather than my place this season. Barry's wife Patti is off to Hawaii for a couple of weeks so Barry is a bachelor. I hopped in my car and went to the Lake. I got to his trailer and it was open but Barry was no where to be found. His truck was there but his scooter was gone....so I hopped on Pattis bike and went for a bike ride to find him. I found myself at the coolest spot. I used my cell phone to take this picture. I sat and enjoyed the spot and then rode back to the camp....still no Barry. I decided that I had come this far with intent to stay so that is what I did. I made myself a little campfire and sat and ate Barrys trail mix and drank the rest of his bottled water...and still no Barry. It felt kinda wierd but what the heck....I had come with a mission. Finally at about 11pm Barry showed up. He had gone to a neighbours and time passed. He was embarrased, but what the heck. I enjoyed the peace and tranquility. Barry likes it so much that he has decided to give up his apartment and live in his trailer. .....haha wait until Patti finds out!